Does anybody read these?

Because I promised...

... and really I am good with promises!

Here are the topics I wanted to tell you all about. Are you excited?

Hot boys, whiskey and Keith Whitley = good times (kind of).

We'll start with the weekend. I was dragging ass on Saturday night, so I headed home put on the PJs and was just heading to bed when my phone rang. I didn't even look at the caller ID before I said "Fuck it," and curled up under the covers some more. I got up to go to the bathroom before bed and realized I had several messages from Alexis and Kay, so I decided to check them before I went to sleep.

They were here. Surprise trip to Nashville for Amy's birthday. I had no clue. And they were very, very lucky that I didn't go to sleep without checking my messages.

But I didn't. So I threw on my clothes, grabbed an overnight bag and headed to Crossroads. We drank, danced and had a great time before calling it a night and passing out at some hotel by Vanderbilt. Bobby wasn't working, but instead entertaining a friend from home. Desi dressed up as a redneck for Halloween. Maybe I was just drunk, but there are few things funnier than a black guy dressed as a racist for his Halloween costume.

The next morning we drove out to Franklin to see "the sights." We went right through Cool Springs to get out to where we needed to go. Funny how we had to do that. And they were coming from Indiana. Well, you learn something new everyday, don't you?

We went to see Bobby, had lunch, I took a nap during the Colts game and then we went out for MORE drinking.

That's when I met this guy Rob from Kentucky. He was very cute. He was a year older than me. He danced with me and sang Keith Whitley in my ear. Always a good thing for a guy to do... Anyhow, I ended up drinking a bit too much (around the time his friend Dan accidentally left his Beam and 7-up in front of me) and we got on the subject of college basketball. Somehow I mentioned that I was a Duke fan.

And he owns a piece of the floor in Rupp Arena and hates Christian Laettner (even today!) like it's his job. The conversation went south from there, which is sad because I'd have done him.

The drinking on Sunday brings me to my next topic...

Baggage: it's not just for the American Tourister store anymore.

So while I was drinking heavily on Sunday, I decided that this made me an awful person and that my friends were going to hate me and not want to be my friends anymore. So I started crying. I hate being that girl -- the weepy drunk. But I just had flash backs and I thought about the drama, and I was convinced that the girls would come home from the weekend and never talk to me again.

I wish that I could say it was the booze talking. I guess if it happens to you once, you're just a little gun shy. I don't know that I'll ever forget when Kym was showing me whatever it was on her computer and that e-mail popped up. In some ways it's really good to learn that you're totally wasting your time on people who aren't really your friends, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt like someone's kicking you in the gut. I could just see myself sitting in that bathroom, crying on the phone to Jenn. I could remember being so upset and it being late at night and I couldn't go home. That sucked.

Because Amy helped me pick the pieces up from that, I know she'd never do it. But the baggage that we carry around from relationship to relationship (platonic or romantic) can do so much damage. It's really amazing that anyone in this world trusts anyone else.

I hate that I honestly thought that my friends would just start hating me out of nowhere, simply because it'd happened before. Especially because these were not the same friends, these were the women who helped me through it when I was so hurt last time. But sometimes those ghosts just get the best of us. And it's not just about those people ... we all have lots of ghosts in our lives.


New job.

I love my new job. It's the best job ever. My coworkers are great, and we all get along well. We're a great team. So, I am loving my job. I think I'll love it even more when we have pay day next week. Or I go to get my tooth fixed when my insurance kicks in. It's going to be a lot of hard work, but it's all work that I love. Where else can I get paid to write and red-pen everyone else's work?!?

And secret topics I haven't quite figured out how to address yet!!!

I am not sure how to address the secret topic that I can't/shouldn't address. Some of you know what I'm talking about. Some of you, I'm sure, just said "What the hell is she talking about now?!"

Well, I wish I could tell you. But I'm not 100-percent sure who is reading my blog right now. (I know, that shocks you, too.) I've already screwed up enough in my life in the last few years, so I'm not doing anything to fuck up yet another thing. So, when it's OK for you to know, you will know.

Or maybe you won't, because frankly it's none of your beeswax!

It's time for bed again (past, actually!), so remind me tomorrow that I want to tell y'all about Nashville Star.

Oh, and I owe Amber another chapter from the book!

posted by Laura at 11:46 PM