Does anybody read these?

Improvements

Aside from taking way too many pictures of my food and getting in lots of kitchen therapy, my life has not been the happiest time lately. However, by the time you read this I will be sitting in day two of an extremely awesome graphic design class, and I have several more days of training that will make me more competitive in job market. And it's being paid for by a scholarship. I've got a few job leads in the hopper and some more offers of freelance work. While life doesn't look like I thought it would, it doesn't completely suck.

I was thinking about this training. I never would've had the opportunity to take this training if I hadn't lost my job and received a state-assigned career counselor. And this training is what's getting me more freelance work. So, things are looking up. I know when you are sitting in the bottom of a pit, crying and hoping someone will hear you, that it's hard to imagine that this is better. I know this because this has been my life for the past few months. There have been jobs that I've wanted that I didn't get, and sometimes I took that personally (especially the jobs that I knew I could really rock), but for whatever reason that's not where I'm supposed to be.

Life is still not rosy. But I'm getting out of the house and I am staying busy. In addition to the design training, I am finally signed up for those comedy writing and performing classes that I keep meaning to take. I have a few events coming up to sell my jewelry. I have a friend from college having her first child in June. I have two friends from college finally getting married after 17 years. I am turning 40 at our annual alumni weekend. I am going to Detroit for a Tigers' game weekend. If I'm still not working in June, I may go on family vacation with my brother's family once the kids get done with school. So while it absolutely sucks to not be working, I have a lot of things on my calendar that might not get to happen if I had a full-time gig.

I have a little money in the bank (although I'm not excited at the prospect of blowing through it). I have projects to keep me busy and keep my creative juices flowing, and I'm looking for more opportunities there. I actually have plenty to keep me busy. I have health insurance through ObamaCare. I would love to have a great job, and I feel like I am going to find something that will challenge me and utilize my skills and allow me to be in a great collegial and collaborative environment. I am not in a place where I feel desperate to just take whatever at this point, so I feel like something great is coming. If not, well, then I'll figure it out when I get there.

So, life doesn't completely suck. In fact, it could be a lot worse. Yes, I miss having coworkers and going to an office everyday and doing great work, and I'm still a little sad at how that ended. No one wants to feel written off, like they never mattered. No one. I don't care what they say. I miss my grandma. My mood's improving, but I still haven't gotten to the gym. I'm still working too much at Babies R Us. I'm still frustrated with other things.

But I got out of bed, put on clean clothes and killed it in my class today. That's so much progress.

Labels: depression, life, self-improvement

posted by Laura at 9:00 AM