Does anybody read these?

Yes, some people are stupid

I've been sick this week. Probably sick enough to stay home if I hadn't had too much at work to do instead. So, I go to work, and then I come home and go to bed the minute that I get home, or at least after I have taken massive amounts of all sorts of drugs.

So, I feel like shit and I am going to bed all kinds of early. My room is a disaster, I haven't packed one thing and I leave in two weeks.

Needless to say, this is not a good time to call me in the middle of the night. And really, there is never a good time to call me when I told you I didn't ever want to talk to you again. Especially if you're calling from your wife's phone because that means that you still have one. Asshole.

If I were a bitch or well enough to conjure the energy to be one, you'd be very, very sorry I had your wife's cell phone number.

But I stopped caring. and I'd have to care even just a little in order to be a bitch. I deleted you out of my phone and gave you back, since that's where you seem to think you belong. And, of course, because I don't sleep with people's husbands, and I just didn't know that's what you were. Once I did, our time together was over. I've never liked anyone enough to be the other woman. And believe me, I liked you a lot. More than I've liked anyone in a long time.

When I woke up this morning and saw I had three missed calls, I figured it was Booty Call Michael. I was too sick to answer if I had heard the phone, but he's generally the only person who calls at 2:45 these days. But I'm glad he didn't, because I was way too sick for all of that fun and merriment last night.

Other people should be very thankful that the phone didn't wake me in the middle of the night. And if it had, that I didn't answer. That's so not cool unless you're one of my best friends or I'm sleeping with you.

And even Booty Call Michael is not always appreciated when he wakes me from my slumber.

posted by Laura at 7:56 AM