Does anybody read these?

It never ends.

So, last week I decided to buy a house.

And then everyone in the world dashed my hopes and dreams.

And now I'm sad.

I have been looking half-heartedly at the real estate listings for months. I would like to be in White Bluff because it's still close to Nashville and close to Chris' family. The problem is that it is becoming a bedroom community of Nashville and it's starting to get expensive. It's not nearly as expensive as Metro-Davidson, or the other nearby outlying counties, but it's not cheap.

So, last week I found a cute little pre-fab log cabin on an acre of land for a steal. I rushed around trying to put in an offer, secure financing, blah-blah-blah. And I keep hitting road blocks.

The first one would be people who were supposed to help me get shit off my credit report not doing it. Remember that credit card that I went back and forth with about whether or not it was paid off this time last year? Well, apparently when they sent me a letter telling me it was all paid off, they forgot to send one to the credit bureau, who told my lender that I still owed them $3,600 (I never owed them $3,600, but whatever). The next would be the student loan people who have put all kinds of odd stuff on there. I guess I will either get it fixed or live in someone's spare room the rest of my life.

Regardless, I spent all day Friday looking at houses (because the lender thought he could get me a loan on something else, but no he can't. Not like I liked anything else anyway), talking to people with money trying to convince them to give it to me, and crying. It's emotionally draining and a little dehumanizing begging strangers for money based on a little three digit number that may or may not reflect your value as a person.

What cracks me up is that it's so damn hard for me to get a manufactured home. Of all the people I know that have manufactured homes, I really think I am doing OK. Of course, maybe they are the ones who ruined it for everyone else, because I'm beginning to think that all of these folks with their subprime mortgage payments bigger than their monthly income have ruined it for folks like me who work really hard and just want a little starter home with a $350/month payment.

I'm just about over the whole thing. It was fun while it lasted, but I guess it isn't meant to be or it would've worked out. I don't really think driving back and forth between my house and Chris' and putting thousands of miles on my new car was really meant to be either, but it sure is looking at it.

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my nosy neighbors?

I just want to move. I just want to get all this crap off my credit report, even if it means paying bills that I don't actually owe (which I did agree to do today -- a doctor's bill that Blue Cross must've changed their mind about paying). I don't know if I'll ever get a house, but until then I can bunk up with Carlton in Uncle Phil's pool house all Fresh Prince-style.

posted by Laura at 4:26 PM