Does anybody read these?

Well, we knew this was coming...

I'm trying to figure out how much to tell here. I haven't ever said where I work. Some of you are my friends and you know, I guess I can give details here without saying anything and those who know won't be shocked by anything I say. And those who do not know will get the gist of what's going on without me saying anything that would jeopardize the integrity of my employer. I'm nice like that.

The honeymoon period quickly wore off at my job. I came into the organization in the middle of a huge transition and there were a lot of issues going on. A lot of energy was put into dealing with management issues, and not as much into things like raising money. I was new and didn't realize exactly how bad the financial situation was or I would've pushed certain things a little harder than I did. We just weren't aggressive enough in our fundraising. Plus little things like managers not mentioning that their funding was running out and how was I supposed to know that?

OK, enough griping. What's done is done. I knew that the organization needed major overhaul and restructuring. And I also know that public relations is not essential and always the first position to go when major restructuring happens, especially if the PR person has the least seniority. I am used to this with my job. I probably should've gone into a more essential field, but this is what I love. I probably should've been more aggressive, but I was just learning the ropes. And once I realized what I'd gotten into I got disillusioned about the whole thing and kind of spiraled into a tad bit of a depression that I really don't think helped anything.

Long story short? My company has to make hundreds of thousands of dollars of cuts. I'm not the only person who's going to have to go. They've been having HR meetings with all kinds of folks. And it's not like I didn't know. I've been looking for jobs ever since the day my paycheck bounced. They just have serious cash-flow issues. I have never seen anything like it before in my life. It's just going to be a little sooner than I thought.

I think I have a game plan, but prayers would be very much appreciated. I have lots of real-world bills and I'm very frightened that I'm not going to get a job to pay them. I am not desititute, nor do I think I will be. I'm just once again at a crossroads in my life.

Mostly, right now, I feel like an idiot for taking a job there against the advice of a few folks. It's done now, and I can't dwell on it. And it'll all work out in the end, right?

posted by Laura at 8:21 PM