Does anybody read these?

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


So, I heard a rumor that my good friend Pat from back home won his election last night to become City Law Director. And sure enough, this is true.

I went to check the paper at our beloved Alma Mater to read the article. I knew they had changed the Web address, so I decided to search on Yahoo. You know how Yahoo suggests other search terms when you search for things, just in case you were confused? (Usually it's because I can't spell.) Anyhow, when you type in "Ohio University" guess what Yahoo asks if you meant to search?

Ohio State University.

You know what, assholes? I didn't mean to search Ohio State. In fact, that is why I hate Ohio State. I went to a better school. I went to a smaller school. I went to the school that was there first. Yeah, our football team isn't number one. Yeah, we don't have a Target, but Ohio State doesn't have the second-best journalism school in the country.

I'm sick of people thinking I went to Ohio State. I'm sick of Ohio State thinking that they can put Ohio on their stadium and their jerseys, have script Ohio and do that O-H-I-O cheer. You're Ohio State. And you know what? Michigan State, Iowa State, North Carolina State, Cal State and pretty much all of the 49 other schools with "state" in their names wouldn't dream of trying to go by the Michigan, Iowa, North Carolina, Cal or any of the other choices. Why? Because they're rivals, and that's idiotic.

Maybe it'd help if more Bobcats hated you. I know I do, because I'm sick of no one knowing where I went to school because you're bigger. I go to Columbus to go shopping (they have the Target), but my top-notch education came from the green and white school from down south that's legally entitled to do the O-H-I-O cheer.

I'll see if I can drum up the lawsuit stuff for you; it's funny. Michigan State should try it.

Also, why the hell is The Post's banner in blue. Green and white, people!

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