Does anybody read these?

Back?

Sheri said in a recent comment that I sounded like I'm "back." I am trying, but I am still so busy. I'm just sneaking a few minutes to write this before I go find some lunch.

I am trying to see if I might able to find a way to spend less time working. I'll keep you posted on that if anything new develops.

I have to deal with my health problems. That is going to require making time to make good meals for myself and making time to exercise everyday. My whole life needs to change in this regard: no smoking, less drinking, more working out.

And less stress and worrying, which is the tallest order. I don't know how I'm going to do that. I know I need to pray more (I'm actually going to stop by St. Edward's at lunch time and see if I can light some candles. Just don't think it can wait until Sunday.) And I need to start forgiving myself for things that I've done. I just run this replay in my head of things that I can't change over and over again. Everything's done. I need to forgive myself, even if others do not forgive me. I can't go back and undo time, and honestly I am not sure I would if I could. Yeah, I made some questionable choices, but I did what I thought was right at the time. Now I need to do what I think is right to keep moving on. I'm not 100-percent sure I'm there yet. I suspect there is going to be more of the proverbial cutting of the fat. We'll see.

There will be real cutting of the fat. I HAVE to lose 50 pounds by the end of the year. It's the perfect time to try, as margaritas and fajitas every week have been postponed indefinitely.

In the next few months, I will probably continue to make a lot of changes in my life. There have been days in the past year or so that I didn't recognize the person who looked back at me in the mirror, but not in a good way. All of that changes today.

Song of the day (I may have used it before, but too fucking bad if that bothers you): Stronger Woman by Jewel.

posted by Laura at 11:17 AM